I still find it quite mind blowing

by Polly

I’m very fortunate that I had an easy pregnancy and  lovely home birth with my daughter, Leila, and that she knew what to do from the word go. So happily I had no problems with breastfeeding and I just found it all quite lovely. Although she was small she even put on weight in her first week and so I just felt rather in awe of the whole process and how amazing the body is to produce just what she needs whenever she needs it.

I’m very fortunate that I had an easy pregnancy and  lovely home birth with my daughter, Leila, and that she knew what to do right from the start. Happily I had no problems with breastfeeding and I just found it all quite lovely. Although she was small she even put on weight in her first week and so I just felt rather in awe of the whole process and how amazing the body is to produce just what she needs whenever she needs it. I still find it quite mind blowing. With my son, Louie, again born small, he took to it immediately and is thriving at 4 months old now. 

Breastfeeding in public was daunting at first but after a couple of weeks it didn’t really bother me. My first public breastfeed was on a bench in Brunswick Square.  My daughter Leila was a week old and crying and needed a feed and home was a good 15 minute walk away. I suppose my urge to feed and comfort my baby was strong enough to overcome any issues about what others may think.  I also had a friend who helped me a lot in that respect which gave me more confidence. Ultimately I felt and still feel that if others have an issue then that’s their problem not mine. I also think it helps living in Brighton where breastfeeding in public is pretty common. To be honest while walking around doing school drop off and pick up with Louie feeding in the sling it’s far more common for me to receive approving looks and comments than negative ones. While traveling to California for example, (to see my husband’s family), some people may breastfeed but those I’ve seen tried to cover it up with a cloth over the baby. Although I can understand why people might feel the need to be discreet about breastfeeding in public I actually think that’s a real shame if people feel so shy about it, that their baby can’t even see their face while feeding. 

One friend in particular was a great support and role model to me when I was a new mum. Through her I met others who shared the same ethos and the strong sense of community and support made a huge difference to me and gave me confidence. 

Breastfeeding has played a very important role in my relationship with my daughter and now my son. My daughter fed till she was two and a half and it was a source of comfort and bonding way beyond the time she needed it for sustenance. It also helped ground her when she found situations hard as a toddler.

My partner has always been 100% supportive of breastfeeding so any impact of my breastfeeding on our relationship has been positive.  

We made a conscious decision to cosleep and so feeding at night keeps it all very peaceful. There are no tears because when Louie needs milk or comfort  I’m right there to give it and I hardly wake up. I cant imagine how much harder and more disruptive it would be to have to get up and faff around with sterilising bottles etc. In that respect I feel very fortunate.

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